The basis of all our problems is separation from God. And
the symptoms of this separation are our wrong relationships with other people.
We look for things from them that are not good for them to give (if indeed they
could). Then, when other people fail us or betray us, we resent them. This
resentment is another form of selfish use, so we become guilty before other
people and before conscience (God). Avoiding the humbling encounter with
conscience, we instead are extra nice to people in order to make up for our
guilt feelings. We want them to take away our guilt. This only makes us guiltier
because we are using them to avoid conscience. When they take advantage of our
need, we again resent them.
If we could relate to God properly, He would show us how to
relate to others properly. But without His guidance, we are lost confused sheep.
We look to outside people for advice, and because they do not have understanding
either, their advice fails us and makes us worse off.
Perhaps now you can see that the pain we feel when we have problems with others
has a purpose. It awakens us to the fact that something is wrong. And if we
remain awake without reaching for symptom removal, and if our attitude changes
to a willingness to admit the part we play when things go wrong, we will begin
to realize our wrong.
God is always there. His mercy and forgiveness are there. And
His guidance is there. We fail to realize His Presence because we seek comfort
from others. We seek their love instead of His. We seek otherís approval instead
of His. We seek their forgiveness instead of His. And when people fail us or we
grow too guilty to continue using them, we look to food, drugs, work,
entertainment, or possessions to make us feel good (and take away awareness of
conflict with conscience). Of course, when our food makes us fat, our drugs give
us side effects, and our possessions become a burden, we make the same old
mistake mistake of resenting them, as if they were the cause of our suffering.
The problem is that we attempted to use material things to help us forget
The proof that we have made others our gods is that we are
afraid to speak up to them. We shake in our boots before worldly authorities. We
also shake before worldly indulgences that we have looked to to make us feel
We have become externalized, so much so that we donít even
notice our conscience anymore. If we do, itís a vague anxiety. And if our
conscience does bother us, we quickly try to dismiss it or cancel it out with
Little do we realize that conscience is our closest link to
Godóthat the conscience we feel is the hindsight we experience when we stray
from the guidance of the Light of Truth that could inwardly silently inform us,
if we would but be still and pay attention to its admonishments.
If it is true that Godís forgiveness is there waiting for us
to accept it, and if it is true that His guidance is there in the form of
wordless intuition and inner guidance, why do we not grasp it, instead of erring
The answer has to do with our own natureówe have a secret
desire to play God and to do whatever we want. We are prideful and rebellious.
We would rather be God than know God. Therefore we shy away from a real
encounter with His Truth, lest our pipe dreams be dashed, our illusions broken
and we be forced to tow the line and do His will.
The answer also has to do with the powers that be. They
prefer that we be lost, confused and making mistakes. There is big money to be
made and lots of power to be had in helping people that are confused and needy.
If everyone were self reliant and intuitively guided by wisdom from God, there
would be no more need for external problem solvers.
Everyone knows about the truth, even bad people. But because
everyone is guilty of playing God, we all shy away from complete honesty, lest
others pull the rug out from under us and point out our wrongs too. When it
comes to standing up for principle, most of us are unwilling to go all the way.
We cop out, preferring to be popular rather than principled. Most dads, for
example, say the right things, but they say them either too weakly or angrily.
However, some of us reach a point where we yearn for the
truth so much that we are even willing to see our own wrongs. When we reach this
point, our soul softens, and we are ready to have our attitude changed from one
of pride and defensiveness against truth to one of humility. This occurs as the
Truth begins to dawn, lighting our darkness and beginning the long process of
salvation. As Truth dawns, the first thing we see is our own wrongs. Mourning
over what we see, we regret the way we are but also realize in the Light that we
cannot make ourselves good. When we are repented by the Truth, we become friends
with Truth. When we are friends with Truth, there is no more need for the
methods we used to use to escape conscience.
Remember--if it is true that we have access to the inner
Light of Truth, this Light of Truth would contain wisdom, and by its very nature
would be a solution to the problems we have acquired during our separation from
the Light. If this is true, then instead of dwelling morbidly on problems and
instead of spending our time seeking face saving answers in imagination or from
experts, we should devote ourselves to finding that inner Light and conforming
Proper meditation, which we teach here at the Center for
Common Sense Counseling, is the thing to do. All that is needed is that it be
combined with a sincere desire to know the truth. When we make knowing the
purpose for which we were created more important than anything, we will be able